Friday, August 29, 2025

Homecoming (Short Story)

Note: A few days ago, I stumbled upon a video on YouTube of a man touring my hometown. The images of ruined buildings boarded up businesses, and abandoned storefronts was shocking to me. I felt a sense of loss and sadness akin to watching a loved one slowly die and being unable to do anything about it. This story was born out of those feelings

The morning light streamed into the penthouse apartment, illuminating a single, crisp newspaper resting on a polished mahogany table. Arthur sipped his coffee, the bitter taste a perfect counterpoint to the buttery croissant and scanned the headlines. A small article on page five caught his eye. “Southern Township in Peril,” it read. The name of the town, a sleepy dot on a forgotten map, hit him with the force of a physical blow. It was his hometown. A place he had not seen in thirty years, a place he had tried to bury under layers of success and distance.

An hour later, he was in a private jet, the skyline of New York a fading memory. He wasn’t sure why he was doing this. There was no one left to see, nothing left to salvage. Yet, a strange, undeniable compulsion had taken hold. From the regional airport, he rented a nondescript sedan, the kind that would blend in with the landscape of rust and faded paint. As he drove, the manicured lawns and towering oaks gave way to cracked asphalt and skeletal pines. The town's welcome sign, once proud and painted a cheerful red, was a splintered, gray wreck.

He drove past the old diner, its windows boarded up and its parking lot overgrown. He saw the high school, its brick facade crumbling, the athletic fields now a tangle of weeds. He pulled the car over, his hands gripping the steering wheel. The memories came unbidden, sharp and visceral. He saw himself, a gangly, awkward teenager with a book in his hand, a target for the boys with their letterman jackets and cruel laughter. "Faggot," one of them had sneered, pushing him into the lockers. The others had laughed. He could still feel the stinging heat of his humiliation, the desperate longing to be anyone else, anywhere else.

He continued his pilgrimage through the ghosts of his past. The town square was deserted, the fountain dry. The old movie theater was a hollowed-out shell, its marquee gone. Each landmark was a tombstone marking a painful memory: the old church where he was taught to fear himself, the public library where he hid from the world, the town pool where he never dared to swim.

Finally, he drove to the end of a long, dirt road, where his childhood home stood. Or, what was left of it. The roof had collapsed in on itself, the windows were shattered black eyes, and the front door hung off its hinges like a broken jaw. A profound sense of loss, not for the town, but for the self he had been here, washed over him. He stepped out of the car and walked inside.

The dust smelled of mold and decay. He moved through the rooms, the floorboards groaning under his weight, each step a step back in time. He saw the kitchen where his mother had criticized his every move, the living room where his father's silence was a heavy, suffocating blanket. He ran a hand along the wall, and the plaster crumbled. A memory of his father’s fist hitting the same wall in a rage flashed in his mind. Then another, of his mother screaming, her face contorted in a mask of fury.

He heard a sound. A whisper. "Arthur... you left us."

He whirled around. Standing in the doorway, a hazy, translucent figure, was his mother. She was younger, her hair dark, her face pinched with disappointment.

"You ruined us," she accused, her voice echoing in the empty space. "This is your fault. We lost everything after you left."

Arthur’s heart hammered against his ribs. He felt a fire ignite inside him, thirty years of suppressed anger and pain boiling over. "I had to leave!" he shouted, his voice hoarse. "I couldn't breathe here! I wasn't allowed to be myself! You wanted me to be someone I wasn't, to live a life that wasn't mine!"

The figure of his mother drifted closer, her face twisting into a sneer. "You think you're better than us?"

"I had to find freedom!" Arthur screamed. "I had to become my true self! I left to live authentically, something you and this town never would have allowed!" He waved his hand at the ruins. "Look at this! This is what your hate and judgment built!"

His voice broke. He doubled over, gasping for air, the anguish of a lifetime of pain finally pouring out.

A few yards down the road, an elderly man named Gus had just stepped out onto his porch. He saw the unfamiliar sedan parked by the old Arthur place and heard the shouting. It was a loud, desperate kind of shouting, the kind that made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. He grabbed his cane and shuffled down the road to investigate. He got to the empty shell of a house, peered through the open doorway, and saw nothing but dust motes dancing in the afternoon light. He stood there for a long moment, scratching his head, before turning and heading back home, the silence of the dying town once again unbroken.

Saturday, August 16, 2025

Your Guide to Guides: Collected Books The Guide to Values (1998)

Have you ever wondered if that old, dusty book on your shelf is a valuable first edition? The world of rare book collecting can seem intimidating, but with the right tools, you can become an expert in identifying and valuing your literary treasures. One of the most essential resources for any aspiring book collector is "Collected Books: The Guide to Values" by Allen and Patricia Ahearn.

This comprehensive guide is a staple in the rare book community, offering a wealth of information to help you navigate the complexities of first edition identification and valuation. Here's a breakdown of how to use this invaluable resource:

  1. Understand the Terminology: Before you dive in, it's crucial to familiarize yourself with the language of book collecting. The Ahearns' guide includes a detailed glossary that explains key terms like "first printing," "first trade edition," "points of issue," and "dust jacket." Understanding these terms is the first step to accurately identifying your book.

  2. The "First Edition" is More Than a Single Printing: The Ahearns' guide emphasizes that a "first edition" can encompass multiple printings. For a book to be a true first edition, it must be the first printing of the first edition. The Ahearns' guide helps you distinguish between these printings by providing specific "points of issue"—unique typographical errors, publisher's marks, or other details that identify the true first printing.

  3. Look for Publisher's Points: Many publishers have specific practices for identifying first printings. The Ahearns' guide provides a detailed list of these "publisher's points" for various publishers. For example, some publishers used a number line on the copyright page, with a "1" indicating the first printing. Others used a specific code or a symbol. The Ahearns' guide decodes these publisher's secrets, making it easier for you to pinpoint a first printing.

  4. Condition is King: The Ahearns' guide doesn't just help you identify a first edition; it also helps you understand how condition impacts value. The guide provides a comprehensive grading system, ranging from "Fine" to "Poor," and explains how a book's condition, particularly the presence and condition of its dust jacket, can significantly affect its market price. A first edition without a dust jacket can be worth a fraction of the value of the same book with a pristine dust jacket.

  5. Cross-Reference with Market Values: The heart of the Ahearns' guide is its extensive list of books and their estimated values. The authors meticulously track auction results and dealer prices to provide a realistic range of values for various first editions. While these are just estimates, they give you a strong starting point for understanding the potential worth of your book.

Using "Collected Books: The Guide to Values" is like having a seasoned book expert by your side. It's a tool that empowers you to move beyond guessing and into the world of informed collecting. By understanding the terminology, looking for publisher's points, and appreciating the importance of condition, you'll be well on your way to unlocking the hidden value of your literary collection.

So, next time you're at a garage sale or Browse an old bookstore, keep the Ahearns' guide in mind. It might just lead you to your next great find!


Carolina Dean 
Rare Book Dealer 

Tuesday, August 12, 2025

The Pages of My Past Loves: The Search for The One!

We've all been there. A new bookstore opens, or a used bookshop a town over is having a sale. The thrill is undeniable. It's the chase, the hunt for that one special book. It's the feeling you get when you first lay eyes on a promising spine peeking out from a cluttered shelf, its cover worn just so, its pages yellowed with the promise of a forgotten story. This, my friends, is the beginning of a love affair.

Just like any great romance, it starts with an intense infatuation. You bring the book home, carefully peel back its cover, and for a few blissful days or weeks, it's all you think about. You read it, you digest it, you let its words become a part of you. This is the one, you think to yourself. This is the book that will define me. You highlight your favorite passages, you write notes in the margins, and you feel as if the author is speaking directly to you, and only you.

But just like love, things can change. You finish the book. You've devoured its secrets, learned its lessons, and now you know it, perhaps, better than it knows itself. The initial passion fades, replaced by a deep and abiding affection, but it's no longer the all-consuming fire it once was. You haven't outgrown the book, exactly. It's more that you've grown with it. You've taken what you needed from it, and now you are ready for something new.

And so, the search begins again. You're not looking to replace your last love, but rather to find the next one. The shelves of your local library and bookstores start to look like a sea of potential partners. Each book has something to offer, a unique story to tell, a different perspective to share. You hold them in your hands, weigh their potential, and wonder if this one will be the one to finally capture your heart.

The truth is, we're not just collecting books. We are collecting experiences, feelings, and pieces of ourselves. Each book we read, each love affair we have, leaves an indelible mark. We keep them on our shelves, not as dusty trophies, but as silent witnesses to our journey. The well-worn copy of the novel you read in college reminds you of the person you were then. The battered paperback from a flea market holds the memory of a rainy Saturday afternoon. And the pristine hardcover that you just finished? It represents who you are now, and the person you are becoming.

Our bookshelves are a curated gallery of our past loves. We never truly let them go. They sit there, waiting, ready to be revisited when the time is right, their stories and secrets ready to be rediscovered with a new perspective. We are forever in search of the one, that singular book that will change everything. And in that search, we find that the true joy lies not in finding that one perfect book, but in the beautiful, messy, and ever-evolving series of love affairs that lead us there.

Looking for your next great love? Start your search here!

Carolina Dean 
Certified Bibliophile 

Friday, August 8, 2025

Wishing Stones & How to Use Them

Have you ever found a smooth, perfectly shaped rock on the beach? It might have a white stripe of quartz running all the way around it. If so, you've found a wishing stone.

For a long time, people have thought of these stones as special. They've been called "lucky stones" or "wishing rocks," and they show how we can find magic in nature.

What makes a wishing stone special?

The white stripe is the key. People believe this stripe holds a special kind of energy. The stone has been shaped by the ocean for years, and the stripe is a symbol of that enduring, powerful force.

The magic isn't in the stone itself, but in your own personal intention. It's about what you bring to it.


How to use your Wishing Stone

The process is simple. Once you find your stone, hold it in your hand and feel its smooth surface.

  1. Find a quiet place. Take a moment away from distractions.

  2. Focus on your wish. Close your eyes and think about what you want. Be clear about your intention.

  3. Rub the stripe. Gently rub the white stripe with your thumb. As you do, imagine your wish coming true.

  4. Make your wish. A common tradition is to throw the stone into the water to release your wish.

However, many people keep their wishing stones. They can be carried in your pocket or placed on a table as a reminder of your wish. Just holding the stone can help you remember your purpose

The real power of the stone

The real magic of a wishing stone isn't a spell or a guarantee. It's the process of using it. It makes you stop, connect with nature, and think about what you truly want. It's a physical reminder of your hopes and dreams.

So next time you're out for a walk, keep an eye out for these little treasures. You might find a beautiful reminder that a little magic can be found anywhere. And sometimes, a simple stone is all you need to hold a powerful wish.

Carolina Dean 
Wish Master 
12th House Books 

Links:

Wishing Stones (12th House Books)